Yesterday was a hard day for my Dad, my sister, my grandparents and I. I know we were all thinking about Mom all day. She passed two years ago on February 17th and I remember that day as a blur. It is tragic losing a parent, and even more so when you aren't at all expecting it. I have a lot of feelings about her death, but mostly I try to remind myself to celebrate her life instead of mourning her absence.
I was looking at some old photos and found these two that are remarkably similar. The first is of Mom holding my little sister Amy:
The second is Mom holding James when he was just six weeks old:
What do I love most about these photos? You know it--her smile.
In her poem "Remember" Christina Rossetti's last two lines say,
"Better by far you should forget and smile
Than that you should remember and be sad."
I don't know that I think of Mom any less, but I try not to be so sad.It may sound cliche, but remember to tell your family how much you love them, because one day you may no longer have the chance.
I told my Dad the other day that even though I had a truly wonderful, almost idyllic childhood, right now what I am most grateful for is the adult relationship I had with my Mom. Talking with her about motherhood, about parenting, about juggling work and home, about the weather, about recipes--those things are what resonate with me right now.
Like any teenager and young adult obsessed with themselves, there were a few years where I was not close with my Mom. Once I grew up a little and got out of my own way, I had the wonderful opportunity to look at her as a friend. I am so glad that I did.
I love you my Mother, my friend. And I smile while I am writing that.
XOXO
Allison
3 comments:
So sweet Allison. You are blessed to have had such a wonderful mother.
love to you, Allison. I miss your mom, too.
I love when you write about your mama. Congrats on your new job!!! :) xoxo
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